Keesters Bring Butt Sisters Together

It seems I have an annoying habit – butt watching. I don’t mean sizing up a tight tush of the opposite sex, although I’ll admit to an occasional glance. I mean literally sizing up the butts I encounter in the course of my day.

The point of this exercise is to determine whose butt is bigger – theirs or mine? The obvious goal is to discover as many butts as possible that are bigger than mine. It’s a good day if the butt ratio is 3 to 1 in my favor, excluding pregnant women and anyone walking around with a wedgie. I figure if a person walks around with a wedgie, how their keester looks to the rest of the world is obviously not a big concern.

I haven’t always been so interested in butts. My interest in keesters has grown in direct proportion to my own keester. It seems the broader my beam has gotten, the more interested I am in the width of neighboring beams. It’s a misery loves company kind of thing.

In the misery loves company category I lucked out. I have 3 sisters, each of which are obsessed with the size of their keester. Believe it or not, we’ve not discussed butt watching – but I’m guessing they enjoy spotting a derriere larger than their own as much as I do. What woman doesn’t?

Recently the Butt Sisters, er rather, my sisters and I went on a sisters-only trip. One sister (the one with the smallest butt) is obsessed with getting our keesters trimmed down to size. She knows none of us are willing to commit time to keester reduction. Her solution, Greer Childers’ Shapely Secrets. Greer is an old broad with the face any plastic surgeon would gloat over. But more importantly, her keester looks good. Greer has a 7-minute program – that’s right, a mere 7 minutes -- guaranteed to produce the tight tush of your dreams.

The catch is --it only works if you actually DO it. There’s always a catch.

My sisters balked at a keester shot, so the trolls will have to do. Do you have any keester-shrinking tips you'd like to share? I won't be happy until my butt (and cleavage) look like the Girl's Gone Wild mistress of Govenor Spitzer. Check her out at Prefers Her Fantasy Life.